Clothing Optional by Alan Zweibel

Author:Alan Zweibel
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9780345509840
Publisher: Random House Publishing Group
Published: 2008-09-15T16:00:00+00:00

Political Positions

I am writing this from a squatting position. Cowering, actually. Inside a small closet in my home in Los Angeles. I spend an inordinate amount of time here these days. Eating. Sleeping. With an occasional reprieve for either a bathroom break or a conjugal visit with my wife, who is similarly hiding in another closet. Such is the result of being in Hollywood during a political season that makes any of the recent storms endured by Florida seem like sighs from an elderly aunt.

For me, politics began in a seated position. In dining rooms. Around seder and Thanksgiving tables where, as a young boy, I would listen in wonderment as relatives liberally employed the present tense when talking about FDR, who, at that point in time, had been quite dead for well over eighteen years. However, even my most polite suggestion about conjugating the verbs in deference to a previous generation were answered with shouts of “You’re too young to understand!” Which I didn’t. And still don’t, because the vast majority of those very relatives are now just as dead as FDR and selfishly took all explanations to their graves with them.

In college, politics moved outdoors and, for the most part, I was standing. Shoulder to shoulder with dozens upon dozens of fellow sloganeers voicing outrage about Vietnam, Nixon, Agnew, and Kent State. Standing upright was the position from which we were best heard. It was also the best position to start running from the tear-gas canisters being fired in our direction. The decibels of my relatives had been replaced by the chemicals of the National Guard, and if I wanted to spare myself burning eyes and irritated flesh, getting a good running start was advisable.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.